All of us at Bilva Life are preparing for our summer break and having devoted some extra time to self nurture following last months newsletter, we are ready to truly relax. Holidays mean different things to different people. Whether you prefer sightseeing, skydiving or sunbathing, it is having the time to spend away from the constraints of day to day commitments that is so rewarding. This holiday time is great for spending with the people we love, for socialising and making new friends.
Our July newsletter addresses a way in which you can empower yourself within one of the six main areas of your life: fostering relationships, work, fun and adventure, physical and mental health, contributing to others and spiritual welfare. It is the equal balance of these in your life timetable, which will allow you to reach your potential in all areas and have a calm, positive attitude.
This month our focus is on fostering relationships. Our relationships with others are one of the most important aspects of our lives, and for many, the relationship with their partner has a direct effect on their health and well being. Fostering relationships is an important aspect of maintaining a healthy balance in our lives, but for many of us we become so involved in other commitments such as work, our social life or the rest of our family that we unwittingly take our partners for granted. This can lead to resentments and conflicts. When challenging, these relationships create further pressure on our already busy life and can cause stress and anxiety for both parties.
Many couples recognise when they have failed to dedicate enough time to each other or have been avoiding or ignoring the challenges that daily life brings. If they have strong communication skills and are equally committed, they are often able to rebuild their closeness. All couples go through difficult times, but it is how those conflicts are managed that can make the difference between splitting up or staying together. Holidays are a perfect time to address these issues, to renew intimacy and to reconnect.
Having the time to truly communicate is a real gift and honest communication is the key to a successful relationship. When emotionally committed to one another then feeling free and safe to ask and answer questions is important. Being able to forgive and accept being forgiven is what unconditional love is all about. Having empathy and patience with people is vital to all relationships but especially to your most important ones.
The HEAL technique lends itself to reconnecting on holidays when you are free from daily life commitments: HEAL – Hear, Empathise, Act, and Love
HEAR – To hear your partner you should stay present and listen; listen beyond the words, to their body language and to their non verbal signs of emotion. Open your heart and put down your defences.
EMPATHISE – Allow you partner’s experience to deeply affect you. Can you understand their anger, passion, disappointment, sorrow etc without judgement, feeling criticised, or trying to fix them? Staying emotionally engaged and expressing compassion can provide healing, comfort and connection.
ACT – Take action to address concerns and show willingness to change. When your partner sees you take his or her concerns seriously they will feel more valued and respected. You don’t have to be perfect! Just the fact that you are trying to change is enough to help most people feel validated.
LOVE - Can you feel and express unconditional love? Make space in your life to deliberately reconnect with the loving feelings you have for your partner, even if recent interactions have made you feel distant or angry. Think about the good qualities they have that originally attracted you to them. Can you find a way to forgive yourself and your partner for the mistakes you have both made that got you off track? Do not make your expressions of love contingent on what your partner does, but rather reach out and express unconditional caring, support, understanding and forgiveness. Contrary to the way relationships are portrayed in the movies, they are not all sunsets and roses. A better analogy is that of an ever-changing, complicated dance. When two people come together with different life histories, sensitivities, and current stresses, you are bound to bump up against each other or get blown off track over the course of a many-year relationship. By using the H-E-A-L technique you are actively reaching for your partner and letting them know that they matter and you care. This should create HEALING energy to move your relationship back to health.
If as a couple you decide to seek professional help then our relationship coach can work with you both to offer support, committed time and experience to help you move forward.
If you are seeking to learn over the holidays, why not come along to one of our summer classes?
Wednesday 27th to Friday 29th August
Advance ThetaHealing® Course
Open to all ThetaHealers
Saturday 30th to Sunday 31st August
ThetaHealing® Manifesting and Abundance Course
Open to all Advanced ThetaHealers
Do you need to do the basic course first so you can come along to these classes? Please contact us to arrange a mutually convenient date. We would love to welcome you at any of these exciting events. For more information on any of these or other upcoming courses, please visit our website.
All of us on the Bilva Life team are here to support you this month as you empower your relationships.
Nicola van Dyke